Thoughts from a Therapist

 I find that there are times when you can learn lessons from simple actions in life today it was a housefly!                                                        Photo by Pete M on Unsplash In Michigan, you often see house flies as I did the other morning. I walked into the bathroom and there was a housefly trying to get out of the window but of course, the screen just kept him in. I watched as this fly dove into the screen only to bounce back time and again. There is a recent 2-inch, kitty-induced, rip in our bathroom screen (probably due to a fly) that I have not yet repaired.   I thought, poor stupid fly! It cannot see that there is an easy out right below where it is pounding its face into the screen. I thought "...see that is what separates humans and animals. We can see the problem and fix it."  So I ...

 Once a 10 yr boy that, was yelling at his mother a lot was brought in to work with me. The mother said I need him to stop yelling at me!  After the first session, she waited in the car while I talked to the boy. He never yelled at me or showed anger in any way. About 3 sessions later the mother came in very upset and said: "I am disappointed he is still yelling at me!"  I asked if he had shared his treatment coping skills with her? She said no. I reminded her that in the first session, I encouraged her to come in and work with us. The mother had chosen not to come in with the boy and when I asked her why she said -  "He is the problem, not me!"  I got her to start participating in treatment with her son (first 15 mins) and we soon found out that communication in the family was not very functional. We made a family plan and an individual plan and things began to work much better.  ------- Photo by  Jordan Whitt  on  Unsplash In the past few y...

  Toxic positivity – the new pop psychology wave. Let me say right now - I do not accept the term TOXIC Positivity on the idea that most people are in no way intending to hurt, dismiss or OFFEND others by being positive.                                                        Photo by Count Chris on Unsplash I don’t normally rant about new pop psychology as it is like a new exercise craze – they come and they go. They make some people’s life amazing for a short time then they just fade away as the books and equipment end up in the garage sale next year. Pop psychology is no different, a new term pops up and the world runs towards the light of it like bugs to the zapper on my back porch. It is exciting and fresh and so revolutionary – it gives us new tools or thoughts to make our lives better. The thing is for a shor...